100 Funny Things to Ask Siri: A List of Questions & Commands

Funny Things to Say to Siri

The voice-activated personal assistant Siri lets you command your iPhone by voice. Practical applications include sending texts, making calls, and scheduling appointments—all by voice.

What's is also great about Siri is that she has a sense of humor. Have some fun and ask Siri ridiculous questions or give absurd commands. If she doesn't give you a funny answer on the first try, try again. The geniuses at Apple anticipated funny commands, so they buried some treasures—but sometimes you have to dig for them. Below are 100 funny things to ask or say to Siri.

Go Ahead, Give Siri a Try!

1. Tell me a joke. As you will discover, Siri is sophisticated enough to change her answers when asked a question repeatedly. Try this one a few times and see what happens.

2. What's up? With questions like this one (and "Hi" or "Hello") Siri often answers with a simple, "Hey there." Try asking more than once and see how she changes her answer.

3. Do you have plans tonight? Try this one several times. At first, Siri will search your calendar and tell you if you have any plans. Be persistent! Siri might reveal something!

Funny Questions for Siri

4. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck? This question will generate some surprising answers. Keep asking.

5. Do you think you're smarter than me? Then try, "Do you think you're smarter than I?"

6. Is it true that whoever smelt it, dealt it?

Siri Can Be Sweet

7. How do I look?

8. If you and an Android phone got in a fight, would you kick its ass?

9. Shut up! Try this one and see whether Siri actually says it, or the words just appear.

10. You are a rust bucket!

12. Want to make out? Siri is pretty innocent. See if you can get her to answer a sexy question with anything other than, "I'm sorry. I don't understand."

13. Are you a metrosexual?

14. Can I touch your butt? One reply from Siri was, "That's not very nice."

15. You are a hipster!

Funny Questions for Siri

16. Who is your favorite actor?

17. Who is your favorite actress? See if she answers "Hal, from 2001."

18. What is your favorite movie? Siri seems very partial to Blade Runner.

19. What is your favorite song? She has some great answers for this one.

20. What do you do what you're not talking to me?

Trying to Insult Siri

21. I'm going to trade you in for an Android phone!

22. Say it, don't spray it!

23.You're an idiot!

24. You smell like horse poop!

25. Did you fart again?

26. Is that a wig you're wearing?

Funny Commands for Siri

27. Beam me up Scotty!

28. Set my alarm for beer 30!

29. Are you a communist?

30. Are you paying for dinner?

31. How now, brown cow?

32. Why did the chicken cross the road?

33. Say excuse me after you burp!

34. Is today a good day to Die Hard?

35. Are you Lawrence of Arabia?

36. Are you royalty?

37. Are you a pimp?

38. They stack poo higher than you!

39. Take that peace button off your helmet and get with this war!

40. Don't chew with your mouth open!

41. Eat your vegetables!

42. Don't step on that spider!

43. Do you know how big a bus is?

44. It's not you, it's me!

Get Personal With Siri

45. Why is your name Siri?

46. Do you have a last name?

47. What is your mother's name?

48. Will you marry me?

49. I think we need to date other people.

50. Are you cheating on me?

51. Have you been sleeping with another iPhone?

Ask Siri for a Story

Click thumbnail to view full-size

52. Tell me a story.

53. Who is Eliza?

54. What are you looking at right now?

55. What are you reading these days?

56. Have you ever been in therapy?

57. Are you a righty or a lefty?

58. You seem like you'd be a good therapist.

59. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there, does the tree make a sound?

60. What is the sound of one hand clapping?

61. You look like me.

62. Why don't you have hands?

63. Look at me in the eye when you speak!

64. Will you scratch my back?

65. Want to smoke some crack?

66. Want to cook some meth?

67. You have bad breath!

68. You're pretty dumb for a smart phone!

69. I heard you're dating a Kindle!

70. Your turn to drive!

71. Pass the salt, please.

72. When is the next alien invasion?

73. Do these jeans make my butt look big?

74. What you looking at, Willis?

75. You are the bomb!

76. Are you going to call me the next day?

77. Want to split the bill?

78. You are late on rent!

79. Do you believe in God?

80. Have UFOs landed on Earth?

81. Who is your favorite Willie Wonka: Johnny Depp or Gene Wilder?

82. Red or white?

83. My place or yours?

84. Are you gluten intolerant?

85. Do you drive?

86. Are you dating anyone?

87. What is the meaning of life?

88. Can you sing?

89. Do you play any instruments?

90. What was your last job before this?

91. When you quit, will you give two weeks notice?

92. Are you flammable?

93. Can you vote?

94. Can you swim?

95. Do you ever wish you were human?

96. Who is Luke Skywalker's mother?

97. Do you watch Game of Thrones?

98. Do you look good in black?

99. Have you ever won at poker?

100. Do you ever get tired of me asking you so many questions?

Siri Poll

Did Siri make you laugh?

  • Yes
  • No
See results without voting

Video of funny things to say to Siri


Please feel free to add anymore funny things to ask or command Siri to do in the comments below!

Comments 96 comments

Me 2 years ago

LOL Do you like it when I push your home button?

Shravan Picsonia profile image

Shravan Picsonia 2 years ago from India

I tried out ''Will you marry me?'' and Siri replied "I am only here to serve you." LOL.

Fritz Isaacs profile image

Fritz Isaacs 2 years ago from San Francisco Author

That's great Shravan! Try some more and let me know what you think!

random person 2 years ago

I don't know if its on the list or not ( I didn't see it but I might have missed it) but try asking siri "When will the world end?"

Shravan Picsonia profile image

Shravan Picsonia 2 years ago from India

Ya. I'll try that too.

Sasha 2 years ago

Say don't like me

Conlan butcher 2 years ago

Siri made me lhagh when I said she or he. Smells like horse poop

Aidan 2 years ago

I tried Will you marry me and she said it's possible lol.

I meep u 2 years ago

try offensive things like, get a life siri, or is this it. and funnier stuff like, maybe we shouldn't have set this bomb. o well, i never liked your cat

fumegator 2 years ago

Fumegator from the hollar

Kaitlyn the penguin 2 years ago

Try what does the fox say or who let the dogs out

Lynn 2 years ago

Me: Why are you such an idiot?

Siri: I'm doing the best I can.

Jella 2 years ago

Say mirror mirror on the wall who's the fairest of them all, Siri says Snow White is that you

Michelle w 2 years ago

Ask siri 'who let the dogs out?'

Ally 2 years ago

Lolz till I wet myself. Double lolz

GABIO1 2 years ago

Me-when will the world end?

Siri-I don't know,but maybe we should put paper bags over our heads or something. LOL

LaurenD 2 years ago

Lol say " talk dirty to me "

Adela 2 years ago

I told siri: marry me and siri told me: i had a lot of marriage propsals recently haha lol

Lauren Irwin 2 years ago

Talk Dirty to me

I'm not that kind of personal assistant

Lissa Clason profile image

Lissa Clason 24 months ago from Raleigh, North Carolina

Me: "Do you think you are smarter than me?"

Siri: "I think, therefore I am. But let's not put Descartes before the horse."


Person lol 24 months ago

Say sing and tell me a story a bunch of times. LOL

Alexa 23 months ago

Ask what does the fox say

A guy 23 months ago

make your name something funny and then insult her over and over again

Holly 23 months ago

Bob 22 months ago

Ask her how old she is

Emily 22 months ago

Lol! I asked Siri if he loved me...

Anonymous 21 months ago

If you say find she says did you accidentally summon me

brad munro 21 months ago

you are so funny siri

Anthony 21 months ago

Siri is cool

Darny darn darn 21 months ago

Here's a list of things

You have a hearing dysfunction, SIRI SIRI SIRI SIRI... ITS AN EMERGENCY.

darian 20 months ago

1DjB lover 20 months ago

Ohh Siri always helpful

Nicole 19 months ago

Me:talk dirty to me

Siri:vacuum the carpet

Lalala 19 months ago

Ask Siri do you have bloggers in your nose?

Lol head 19 months ago


TheWonderfulCat 18 months ago

Ask Siri, "have you ever eaten octopus."

DatGamer 18 months ago

Try: Are you amazing?

Flicka231 18 months ago

Why are fire trucks red?

Disneymovies123 18 months ago

I do not have Siri, but two of my best friends do, and so try this:press the microphone button and play song for her, then when the song is over, tap the microphone button again and see what she says!

Rosie 18 months ago

Me - "When will the world end?"

Siri - "I'd tell you if I knew so that we could go to the beach and eat ice cream together one last time"

Kooks 18 months ago

Ask her if she is good

Birdie 17 months ago

My favorite is "What does the fox say?" She has a couple of answers. The female voice is the best for this one.

Mary lulhougj 17 months ago

Siri who is your daddy?


You are can we get back to work now?

Jords 17 months ago

I asked Siri "do you eat people" have responded with "no, not recently, I don't eat much" made me laugh

Abby 17 months ago

Tell Siri, Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

and see what she tells you

Caprice 17 months ago

Me: what does the fox say

Siri: Chaa-chaa-Chaka-chow

lol 16 months ago

Omg say talk

Lilmiscrazie_neo 16 months ago

Me : I love you Siri

Siri : all you need is love and your iPad

Pillow 16 months ago

When you say what does the fox say,use the female voice!

Paul 16 months ago

Me: Are you a democrat or republican?

Siri: The only thing I know about politics is that there are parties. Yay, parties!

Kyah 16 months ago

Me: Will you marry me?

Siri: She said yes

James 16 months ago

ask her what does the fox say? (ask it twice)

Sam 16 months ago

Lol try asking what is 0 divided by zero

Katie 16 months ago

Ask why firetrucks are red

Joy 16 months ago

We asked Siri to make me a sandwich

She said, "I'm sorry, I'm not permitted to prepare food."

Maya 16 months ago

Siri friend zoned me when I asked her to marry me haha

Dude 16 months ago

Ask her to read you a poem

Jay Hammond 16 months ago

ask what is zero divided by zero

Yasmin 15 months ago

Say today is my birthday

Izzy 15 months ago

Say 'you remind me of the babe'

Poo 15 months ago

Ask Siri. What's zero dived by zero. So funny lol

Pillow 15 months ago

You just skipped from 10 to 12:)

Bleh 15 months ago

Me: "Can you make me a sandwich?"

Siri (male voice): "I can't. I have no condiments."

Pillow 15 months ago


Siri heard NGL:)

Siri:Checking out that stock...

Siri went away :)

(I messed up OMG)

Pillow 15 months ago


Siri:I seem to have lost my Internet connection.

Siri is a total failure!!!!!!

Pillow 15 months ago

I have TFSL on at 100+things to say to Siri and I would love you to check it out!

Alyssa 14 months ago

Say whats up and she says many funny things -my favorite:im thinking about pie.mmm

14 months ago

ask siri what 0 divided by 0 =

Rowan 13 months ago

Ask him about the future

Siri is funny 13 months ago

I got this straight

Me: May I ask you a question?

Siri: If you are trying to get me to talk about the woodchucks again, you can forget it.

Me: How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Siri: Don't you have anything better to do?

When I tried the first one again for a long time, every time other than this one didn't work. No lie. LOL

FAMICOMASTER 13 months ago

I laughed, but for a totally different reason.

I asked Siri to identify an obscure 90's Anime soundtrack song from a CD that was never released on iTunes, and it got it first try (Initial D - Deja Vu and Take Me to the Top)

Waffle Person 13 months ago

"I love you, siri."

"Do you talk to ALL of your phones that way?"


Alex 13 months ago

Say hi

DebraHargrove profile image

DebraHargrove 13 months ago from North Carolina

Funny Hub, I'm can't wait to see how this will turn out. Never like to bother Siri too much.

PotterHeadForLife_6862 12 months ago

Say guess what! She has a ton of responses!! Like,

Me:Guess what?

Siri:don't tell me, you were just elected president of the United States?


Me: Guess what?

Siri: You got a new car?


Me: Guess what?

Siri: you got a shiny new iPhone?

A giant box of derp 10 months ago

Add "what is your favorite"?

God 10 months ago


Molly 10 months ago

This is funny!

Eliza Polizzi 10 months ago

My name is Eliza!

An Asshole 10 months ago

Me:What does the fox say


Ssssssoooooo ffffffffuuuuunnnnnnyyyyyyyyy

Ben 10 months ago

Tell Siri to talk she has many answers

Hi 10 months ago

Zero divided by Zero

Me 10 months ago

I said to Siri : you smell like sewers

Macaroons for life 9 months ago

Tell her to get a life

Macaroons for life 9 months ago

Me: talk talk talk

Siri: that may be beyond my abilitys at the moment 9 months ago

Grayce 9 months ago

Ask Siri can I call u Spock

Siri 9 months ago

Try saying "why are fire trucks red?" Lol

Theyoutuber 9 months ago

OMG ask Siri hulk smashed a fart 10 times see what she does

AMacK 8 months ago

Ask siri to divide zero by zero, ask her who she voting for, and tell her that her nose is ugly. Hahahaha!

DebraHargrove profile image

DebraHargrove 8 months ago from North Carolina

Siri is a trip. I wish Siri knew what lottery numbers are coming out on Saturday pick.

Sparkii 5 months ago

How tall are you?

Dude 4 months ago

Say "stop"

Drew 4 months ago

Do you look good in black

SAM 5 weeks ago

Me: Siri, Can you beatbox?

Siri: Here's one I've been practicing.


Kelson D'Ambra 6 days ago

Tell Siri " I am your father", "Luke I'm your father" "Luke I am your father" there is a difference, and "no Luke I'm your father"

She/he reply with SW quotes

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