100 Funny Things to Ask Siri: A List of Questions & Commands
Funny Things to Say to Siri
The voice-activated personal assistant Siri lets you command your iPhone by voice. Practical applications include sending texts, making calls, and scheduling appointments—all by voice.
What's is also great about Siri is that she has a sense of humor. Have some fun and ask Siri ridiculous questions or give absurd commands. If she doesn't give you a funny answer on the first try, try again. The geniuses at Apple anticipated funny commands, so they buried some treasures—but sometimes you have to dig for them. Below are 100 funny things to ask or say to Siri.
Go Ahead, Give Siri a Try!
1. Tell me a joke. As you will discover, Siri is sophisticated enough to change her answers when asked a question repeatedly. Try this one a few times and see what happens.
2. What's up? With questions like this one (and "Hi" or "Hello") Siri often answers with a simple, "Hey there." Try asking more than once and see how she changes her answer.
3. Do you have plans tonight? Try this one several times. At first, Siri will search your calendar and tell you if you have any plans. Be persistent! Siri might reveal something!
Funny Questions for Siri
4. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck? This question will generate some surprising answers. Keep asking.
5. Do you think you're smarter than me? Then try, "Do you think you're smarter than I?"
6. Is it true that whoever smelt it, dealt it?
Siri Can Be Sweet
7. How do I look?
8. If you and an Android phone got in a fight, would you kick its ass?
9. Shut up! Try this one and see whether Siri actually says it, or the words just appear.
10. You are a rust bucket!
12. Want to make out? Siri is pretty innocent. See if you can get her to answer a sexy question with anything other than, "I'm sorry. I don't understand."
13. Are you a metrosexual?
14. Can I touch your butt? One reply from Siri was, "That's not very nice."
15. You are a hipster!
Funny Questions for Siri
16. Who is your favorite actor?
17. Who is your favorite actress? See if she answers "Hal, from 2001."
18. What is your favorite movie? Siri seems very partial to Blade Runner.
19. What is your favorite song? She has some great answers for this one.
20. What do you do what you're not talking to me?
Trying to Insult Siri
21. I'm going to trade you in for an Android phone!
22. Say it, don't spray it!
23.You're an idiot!
24. You smell like horse poop!
25. Did you fart again?
26. Is that a wig you're wearing?
Funny Commands for Siri
27. Beam me up Scotty!
28. Set my alarm for beer 30!
29. Are you a communist?
30. Are you paying for dinner?
31. How now, brown cow?
32. Why did the chicken cross the road?
33. Say excuse me after you burp!
34. Is today a good day to Die Hard?
35. Are you Lawrence of Arabia?
36. Are you royalty?
37. Are you a pimp?
38. They stack poo higher than you!
39. Take that peace button off your helmet and get with this war!
40. Don't chew with your mouth open!
41. Eat your vegetables!
42. Don't step on that spider!
43. Do you know how big a bus is?
44. It's not you, it's me!
Get Personal With Siri
45. Why is your name Siri?
46. Do you have a last name?
47. What is your mother's name?
48. Will you marry me?
49. I think we need to date other people.
50. Are you cheating on me?
51. Have you been sleeping with another iPhone?
Ask Siri for a StoryClick thumbnail to view full-size
52. Tell me a story.
53. Who is Eliza?
54. What are you looking at right now?
55. What are you reading these days?
56. Have you ever been in therapy?
57. Are you a righty or a lefty?
58. You seem like you'd be a good therapist.
59. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there, does the tree make a sound?
60. What is the sound of one hand clapping?
61. You look like me.
62. Why don't you have hands?
63. Look at me in the eye when you speak!
64. Will you scratch my back?
65. Want to smoke some crack?
66. Want to cook some meth?
67. You have bad breath!
68. You're pretty dumb for a smart phone!
69. I heard you're dating a Kindle!
70. Your turn to drive!
71. Pass the salt, please.
72. When is the next alien invasion?
73. Do these jeans make my butt look big?
74. What you looking at, Willis?
75. You are the bomb!
76. Are you going to call me the next day?
77. Want to split the bill?
78. You are late on rent!
79. Do you believe in God?
80. Have UFOs landed on Earth?
81. Who is your favorite Willie Wonka: Johnny Depp or Gene Wilder?
82. Red or white?
83. My place or yours?
84. Are you gluten intolerant?
85. Do you drive?
86. Are you dating anyone?
87. What is the meaning of life?
88. Can you sing?
89. Do you play any instruments?
90. What was your last job before this?
91. When you quit, will you give two weeks notice?
92. Are you flammable?
93. Can you vote?
94. Can you swim?
95. Do you ever wish you were human?
96. Who is Luke Skywalker's mother?
97. Do you watch Game of Thrones?
98. Do you look good in black?
99. Have you ever won at poker?
100. Do you ever get tired of me asking you so many questions?
Did Siri make you laugh?
Video of funny things to say to Siri
Please feel free to add anymore funny things to ask or command Siri to do in the comments below!